An Act of Kindness

For weeks, the kids and I have been looking for a random act of kindness to perform. And, since money is tight in Mandyland, we thought about low and no cost ways to help people. Joseph came up with giving all the kids who don't have families to parents who don't have kids.

My boy is efficient, isn't he?

After trying to explain adoption and the foster care system, we put on our thinking caps.

We make sure we buy an extra box of pasta and can of soup to drop in the Food Bank bins, but that's not very random since it's done at every shopping trip.

I'm careful not to cut people off and I'm more than happy to let someone else have that parking spot near the store, but that's not kindness, it's just safe driving and the knowledge I need the exercise.

The best idea we've been able to come up with is to make hats for the babies in the NICU. So, Joseph and Elizabeth picked through my yarn and selected colors they thought would make pretty hats. And I'm knitting while watching TV in the evenings. We thought six was a good number. Actually, Joseph thought three hundred was a good number, but we decided to compromise.

I was comfortable in my role as the provider of a random act of kindness. I felt good. I felt happy.

But then, I became the recipient of an act so generous, it literally took the starch out of my knees.

Well, not literally. I don't have starchy knees.

I don't write or talk about finances much. Money, to me, is fluid. Sometimes I have it. Sometimes I don't. There have been some very lean years in my life and there have been years when I didn't blink an eye to drop a couple grand on a party. Lately, we've been on the lean side. Chad finished his disability and apologetically told me he wouldn't be able to pay me anything in child support until he could find a job.

I wasn't too worried.

Fine.

I was worried.

But I knew I'd be okay. If nothing else, I know how to work hard. I knew I'd be able to figure it out at some point. Plus I have very generous family and friends who have helped the kids and I out in more ways than one.

So I was worried, but knew it would all be okay.

And then, yesterday, someone gave me a check.

I don't know these people. They don't know me.

I do know their story.

They're don't have a "home" church. All year, they've taken the money they would normally tithe to their church and set it aside. At the end of the year, with no home church in sight, they decided to use that money to help random people.

I was one of those random people.

I didn't know what to say. I wanted to tell them to give it to someone who needs it more than I do. After all, the kids and I are fine. We have a cozy home, food, clothes.

We're not living in poverty. Not by a long shot.

But to not accept their act of kindness seemed...crass. Rude.

So I took it and wrote a thank you note to be mailed in a box with a couple jars of jam. Then, I sat with the check in my hand and tried to decide what to do.

I'm going to use part of it to pay off a credit card I used to buy Joseph's asthma medications.

The rest, I'm going to pay forward to someone who might need it more than I do.

And, no matter how tight my finances are, I'm going to set aside a little each month so that next year, I can do the same. On a smaller scale.

I'm hoping it will quiet the nagging voice in my head telling me I don't deserve this sort of largess and to give it all away. Because the practical voice is telling me to be very grateful I won't have to pay interest on medication.

What would you have done?