Vitamin Aisle

I don't usually take vitamins.

This is not something I'm proud of. Of course I took a prenatal vitamin every single evening while pregnant and nursing, but after the "need" for it was gone, I never got around to buying a new multivitamin.

Lately, though, I've been having trouble sleeping.

Lately being defined as the last year or so.

I can actually list the nights when I slept well and woke rested, which made me think I should do something about that whole insomnia thing. Especially when I started to notice the wrinkles and bags appearing under my eyes giving me the appearance of a crone.

I tried making a resolution to get to bed early every night. And, while I'd go to bed, I'd lay there in the dark, mind racing while telling myself to relax, for God's sake.

My therapist told me two years ago, when sleep issues first started to arise, to take melatonin.

I scoffed. All I needed was to get to bed earlier, maybe work out during the day, and stop watching crime shows that convinced me each bump in the night was a serial killer.

And yet, I couldn't sleep.

Finally, in desperation, I went to the store to buy a bottle. I picked it up off the shelf and headed to the check out lane. Never let it be said I don't take my therapist's advice. Even if it is two years later. (There's probably something about stubbornness in there.)

"Did you know this is on sale buy one, get on free?" she asked while I wondered when check out clerks got so young.

"Yeah, but I'm not sure I want to commit to a year's worth of Melatonin if I don't know it works."

"There are a lot of other items."

"That's okay."

"It's free," she said slowly.

"Oh," I could tell I wasn't going to get away with just buying my one bottle. "Okay. I'll go grab something."

I walked back to the aisle and joined a 70-year-old man to stare blankly at the wall of vitamins.

"What are you looking for?" he asked.

"No clue," I replied. "What about you?"

"Hell if I know."

We both stared at bottles promising to give one better hair and nails, more energy, faster metabolism, better kidney function, immunity against the plague...everything short of the fountain of youth.

The man next to me reached out for a bottle of Ginkgo Biloba. "I guess I should improve my memory so I'll know why I'm standing here."

I grabbed a bottle of Biotin and thinking my nails were a little brittle. "Better get two bottles. They won't let you check out if you don't take advantage of the sale."

"Thanks," he said, frowning again at the wall.

I checked out and went home, taking the melatonin an hour before bed. The damnedest thing happened.

I got tired.

I relaxed.

I lay down.

My mind started to pick up speed and then shrugged its shoulders and said, "Eh. I'm too relaxed. Who cares about what you're making for dinner tomorrow night."

And I slept.